Do you have trouble concentrating? Do you constantly neg yourself out when challenged or want to take a giant leap at something you fear? Do you negatively reinforce bad habits subconsciously not even knowing that you do it? Do you feel crippled by certain social constraints?
I sure know used to, being lead around by that little voice in my head telling me to keep my head down and be pushed around by the world. I finally decided that I had had enough and started to fight it.
After many attempts at stopping my internal dialogue unsuccessfully I turned to books to source my information. These started me on the quest to completely silence my negative internal dialogue, finally taking control of my action and rebelling against societies negative influence.
At the time I was attending ‘building better men’ group talks where a few guys around the local area would meet and chat about topics we wanted to discuss. They ranged from early twenties to late forties and fifties, mostly been around the middle range of the two extremes.
In one of these meeting I brought up the subject of negative internal dialogue and some of the guys had heard about it. One of the older guys, Brent, had not only heard about it but had successfully managed to conquer it. We discussed it for a little while but not at the depths I wanted.
After the meeting I stopped the Brent before he managed to escape my interrogating questions. I asked him to explain a little deeper into what internal dialogue was all about and how to overcome it. This is some of what he described to me and also some of the things I learnt about in my attempts to implement it.
What is Internal Dialogue?
Internal Dialogue is the concept of the thoughts and audible speech in your mind. There is positive dialogue and negative dialogue. They both have strengths and weaknesses that can affect the way we live life.
Society infects our dialogue early in our life and certain things can stick with us throughout our whole lives that cripple us in certain social settings. Some affect us more than others and we generally don’t try and tackle the big problems in our life because they scare us. That’s fair enough. It’s not our fault that certain things interfere with healthy mental growth at young ages, its just bound to happen. Its just life, the hand we have been dealt with, that we have to accept.
That is possibly the best first step you can make. Totally accept that this is the life you have been handed, that all you can do is take it and develop it into the best life you possibly can.
The fight against the Internal Dialogue.
What can you do now? I wrote an article that covers a step by step system that can help quieten your internal dialogue that is located here.
It is a two-part piece that I wrote over a week of contemplation and reflection. I feel like I will write on this more once I have grown in my knowledge and experience more.
Brent told me that the best way to tackle it was to take it in small chunks and progress everyday by putting your self out there. Not to try and get from start to finish in one big chunk. To break it down and take baby steps, it’s all about baby steps.
Find out where your edge is, the edge of your comfort circle. Where you draw the line. Then step over it just a little bit so you’re outside of it. Continue to do this everyday until you find that its inside you comfort zone, then you can rinse and repeat until you get to your final goal.
Tags: internal dialogue, Mind wax
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